A recent GH boardroom meeting:

Phelps: “I want to thank everyone for coming. We have a special guest today, so I’ll turn the meeting over to him. Mr. Frons....”

Frons: “Thanks Jill. As you know with the return of Rick Springfield to the cast, and the subsequent ratings spike, we will be bringing back other GH veterans as well. Bob, Bob. Are you with me on this?”

Pratt nudges a sleeping Guza awake.

Guza: “Right Brian. I totally agree.”

Phelps: “Brian, I have a question. With the return of those veterans, will we be going back to an older format? For instance, does this mean that the executive producer will direct the show’s content, and make hiring and firing decisions again?”

Frons: “No Jill. We’re not going to make any drastic changes, just shift our focus a little. You’ll continue to work behind the scenes, and hopefully stay out of trouble. You know the writers have enough problems without the money people getting involved.”

Frons: “The next thing I’d like to talk about is Chuck’s new pilot, and recognize a job well done. I think it’s safe to say that this is probably a done deal Chuck considering the success of Desperate Housewives. Congratulations. I think this one just might be your ticket to prime time.”

Pratt: “Thanks Brian.”

Guza: “Chuck’s leaving? I’m going to need a new writing partner Brian.”

Frons: “Don’t worry Bob. We’re on top of it. In the meantime, the network thought it might be helpful for you and some of the writers to see a counselor. There seems to be some reluctance from the writing staff regarding story development for the returning vets, and the network is adamant that the mob not be at the forefront of every story. You know Bob, this might take some thinking outside the box.”

Guza: “These new ideas take a little getting used to Brian. You know how old habits die hard, but I’m game. When do we start?”

Frons: “Right now Bob. I’ve asked Ms. King here today just for that purpose.” 

Guza: “Kent’s an actress Brian, not a therapist.”

Frons: “I think we can all agree that therapists aren’t cheap Bob, and with our current budget constraints, we’ve had to make some compromises. Kent’s done an amazing job with her role, and mostly because of the background research she did preparing for it. Her assistance in this matter exemplifies not only what a team player she is, but also solidifies her commitment to making her character even more credible. It’s a win-win situation Bob.” 

Guza: “Well, let’s get to it then.”

King: “Sure Bob. Follow me.”

Ms. King shows Guza to a nearby office.

King: “Have a seat Bob. I guess we should get right down to business. Let’s start with your childhood. Did you like your parents?”

Guza: “I don’t like to talk about my childhood Kent. Everyone knows I was put up for adoption. What does that have to do with anything anyhow?”

King: “Just thought it might be helpful to know where you’re coming from. How about we try something else?”

Ms. King reaches in her briefcase and pulls out several Rorschach tests.

King: “I just love these. Have you ever done Rorschach tests Bob?”

Guza: “I don’t think so.”

King: “It’s easy. All you have to do is tell me the first thing that pops into your head when I show you the inkblot. Here’s the first one.” 

Guza: “I don’t know. Maybe blood splattered on a sidewalk?”

King: “And this one?”

Guza: “That’s what a dead body looks like after it’s been dumped in the river a couple of weeks.”

King: “What about this one?”

Guza: “Flying debris from a bomb explosion.”

King: “This doesn't seem to be getting us anywhere, but let's try one more. How about this one Bob?”

Guza: “Ziti.”

King: “Interesting. Maybe some free association might help. Do you know what that is Bob?”

Guza: “Kind of like the Rorschach test only with words?”

King: “Very good Bob. Let me think a minute. OK, I’ve got it. Happiness.”

Guza: “Cataclysmic event.”

King: “Fun.”

Guza: “Torture.”

King: “Love.”

Guza: “Mayhem.”

King: “Dark.”
Guza: “Darker.”

King: “History.”

Guza: “Sorry, I’m drawing a blank on that one.”

King: “Well, that's all the time I have for today Bob, but I think this is probably going to take a few more sessions. Can we meet again next week?” 

Guza: “Do I have a choice?”

King: “Not really. Can you send another writer in on your way out?” 

Guza: "Sure."


By: Charlotte

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