Life Forensics:  Because the Unexamined Life Is Not Worth Living

March 20, 2007

Happy Spring!  I am so very excited that the equinox is here!!  Today is overcast and a little dreary, chilly and dank.  We were supposed to get rain last night and today, but it has yet to manifest.  I already miss the warmth that we have had over the past two weeks.

Certainly, we will get more snow, whether it's a little or a lot remains to be seen.

For today, however, we're between the two extremes.  There's low hanging fog and I can't seem to get warm today.

We finally got our taxes completed on Sunday, which was an interesting endeavor since Eric essentially started two businesses last year (the mail route is considered a contract, so it's a 1099 situation, and the General Telemetry & Electric).  We made our way through it, though, and got it all sorted out.  We are both relieved to have that handled for the year.

I am so very excited that I have completed buying the tickets for me and Delena for the GH Fan Club weekend in July.  I can feel that this is going to be the best year yet.  The vibes are definitely in the air for a stress-free, fun time with friends.  I am so excited to be sharing this time with Delena.  I wondered if maybe I would feel imposed upon since this is my "me" time away from the family, but I found that the exact opposite is true.  I LOVE sharing this with her and it has truly allowed me to see her in a different light and recognize what a fun, intelligent young woman she has become.  Having her there actually makes the experience better for me.

I can feel that I am not getting enough sleep. This daylight savings time crap messes me up every single year.  When and if the government ever comes to its senses and scraps the whole idea, it will be a happy day for me.  For the moment, I'm getting up way too early and my inner clock is not handling knowing when to go to bed, so I feel tired all of the time.  Also, this is my PMS week and that leaves me with low energy and feeling all bloaty and cumbersome.

Since we celebrate the Equinox instead of Easter, my kids will have their baskets this weekend.  We have a tradition that the kids really enjoy that when they get up, there is one plastic egg in their basket.  That one egg has a clue to where they will find the next egg and what small gift they will find beside the next egg.  The next egg has another clue and so they have about 5-6 eggs leading them around the house to find their Equinox gifts, culminating in their "big" gift. 

We're going to take them to see the new Ninja Turtles movie on Friday, so it should be a nice weekend for them.  Our friend, Jenn, is coming up to visit so that should be a nice weekend for us too!

I was tremendously happy to see the trailer for the Pirates of the Caribbean movie that comes out on May 25th.  It looks wonderful and I can't wait to see it.  Yahoo has it up now if you want to check it out.

I did watch Dancing With the Stars season debut last night and I found myself wanting to do my own trimming down of the stars right away.  I do realize that sometimes, some of the stars are late bloomers and get better right away as the weeks go by, but it's going to be painful to watch until then.  I loved that little Apollo fellow who is an olympic skater and his super young trainer.  They bring a very vibrant, "alive" energy to the show which is very needed with the dismal cast of female "stars" chosen for this season.  They were all very stiff and uptight and looked like they were being forced to perform.  No joy, no joy, no joy.  I'd oust all of the ladies immediately.  The only POSSIBLE contender was Laila Ali, who showed good potential.

Clyde Drexler and Billy Ray Cyrus battled one another for the title of "worst, most boring, most mind-bendingly awful start."  I could go my whole entire life and never know a song exists called "I Want My Mullet Back."  But no, Billy Ray felt this was something I needed to know.  I might never forgive him for that.

If I hear anything else about how brave Heather Mills is for doing this with a prosthetic leg, I am going to want to pull it off of her and beat her in the head with it.  I think it would have been much more interesting had they NOT ever mentioned that she has a prosthetic leg and just had it whiz off of her in the middle of a particularly volatile "Jive" exhibition. THEN start talking about the motorcycle cop that ran her over in front of Kensington Palace and destroyed her leg.  Now THAT would be entertainment!

Especially if it happened to be followed by some really juicy gossip about Paul McCartney.

Fake leg aside, it was obvious that the judges were baking out all of their grey cells trying to come up with ways to describe her awful dancing that did not include the words "stiff" or "wooden."

John "Cliff From Cheers" Ratzenburger really surprised me by turning in an absolutely respectable first effort, especially considering that he was a last minute replacement for *somebody* (I don't know who) and only had 2 weeks to prepare.  He done good.

Although Apollo was great and is a major contender, at the moment, the contest is definitely between the very loveable Joey Fatone (who is snippity little Barbie trainer calls "Joey Fat One," bitch) and Ian Ziering (some guy from 90210 who I never heard of before last night).  They both just came out the starting gate kicking ass.  Mind you, Ian is also paired with two time champion of DWTS, Cheryl Burke, so he has quite an edge.

Psst.  I voted for Joey and Kym.

...a few times

I was recently asked what three bits of advice I would give someone who wanted to find peace, lighten their mental load and create balance in their life.  I thought about it for a long time and came up with this:

1)  Never say 'no' if you're going to regret taking a chance or 'yes' if you're going to regret it later.

2)  Wear cute shoes.

3)  (You know what's coming next)  Be particular.

I think those three things could change the face of society if truly embraced and acted upon.

Time to go be a mom and help the boys clean up their room, then put all of my clothes away in the dresser and closet.  I hate that part of laundry.

I also insist on waking up tomorrow more rested than I feel today.

You know what to all things, be particular.  They other two are pretty good thoughts as well, though.

March 12, 2007

Do you think this is hopeful enough?  I couldn't look at the snow any more when it's (get ready!) 70 degrees outside!!  The snow is all melted in front, but in the back past the fence, there's still a good 4-6 inches that has a hard crust on it and has not melted yet.  It will likely be here for a long while yet.  The good news is that I rarely go out there, so who cares?

The weather is positively beautiful out and I'm really drinking it in.  Sure, the dogwoods have not bloomed yet, so we are definitely going to have another snow, but how much and for how long is the real question.

Meanwhile, I'm lovin it.

When I was delivering mail today, feeling the sun on my shoulders was absolutely glorious.  I felt reborn.

It has been a really exciting time.  Who would know that after 10 years together that Eric and I would have so much to talk about and teach one another?  We were talking about different aspects of our relationship and it was wild to learn that the way we thought the other one felt or was ended up being completely different, but in a good way.  It turns out, our goals and hopes are completely in tandem and there were a whole lot of old, outmoded and destructive thought processes I was employing that were seriously holding us back.

I feel as though a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders as a result and so feeling reborn because of the sun shining is very symbolic for me.  This is definitely a banner year and I am excited at the changes that are happening.

Chief among them is the decision to fully embrace physical fitness.  I work out at least 5 days a week and we've gotten up to 45-60 minutes at a stretch.  Eric says he is going to walk the dogs with me every day, so that will give me another 45-60 minutes of cardio each day.  My knees are sore from the squats and lunges, but I believe that is from the amount of weight I am putting on them when I do those exercises.  I think it will resolve as my weight lowers and my strength builds.  I do feel very much better, much stronger and more capable.

It's funny how doing something like exercising every day causes a plural meaning in that not only do you feel stronger in the sense that you are physically stronger, but also stronger in the sense that you feel more capable and empowered.  I used to believe that this was something I couldn't do and here I am doing it.  I used to believe that any observation about me as a person that came from Eric was a criticism when sometimes it's merely something that he is seeing that I don't.

This year in particular, I have felt myself opening up to new ideas, new possibilities and new ways of thinking.  It makes me think of the title of the wonderful Iyanla VanZandt book, One Day My Soul Just Opened Up.  That is so telling and expressive and accurate.

I have learned that the more we impose labels on ourselves and create thoughts that are absolutes (he always, he never...), the more we limit ourselves.  When we put ourselves in a box of any kind, the sides of that box turn into walls and then there we are, trapped by limitations of our own making.

I am listening to my Sweet Potato Queens audio books again and they always make me smile.  I have "Stranger That Fiction" to watch, plus the new Christiane Northrup lecture on Menopause and Beyond.

With any luck, the worst of the snow is behind us and we can look forward to months of glorious weather.  I'm definitely ready to great the warmth of the year and put the Winter behind me!

I hope you are having warm, beautiful days and have the opportunity to enjoy them fully!

Be Particular,